


it could mean everything to me (please stay forever with me)

by booksandanime



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: AN OVERLOAD OF FEELS, And how they almost lost each other, Angst for about 5-10 seconds, Featuring: Yuuri and Victor being very gay and very much in love with each other, Fluff, Like their feelings for each other, M/M, Phichit being the greatest friend, Staying by each other's side, Victor and Yuuri actually talking about things, Yuuri's doubts, Yuuri's mom being very supportive
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-22
Updated: 2016-12-22
Packaged: 2018-09-10 21:45:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,031
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8940607
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/booksandanime/pseuds/booksandanime
Summary: "Would you follow me?" Victor would ask."To the ends of the earth." Yuuri would answer.(Or, a story of time, of skating, of longing, of love, and of staying by each other's sides.)





	

**Author's Note:**

> DID ALL OF YOU SEE THAT QUADRUPLE FLIP, BECAUSE I AM VERY PROUD OF MY LITTLE KATSUDON, HE'S GROWING UP SO FAST. ^ ^
> 
> Also, here. *dumps fic* THIS WAS THE OUTCOME OF ALL MY FEELS FROM EPISODE 12 SO I APOLOGIZE IF IT SEEMS MESSY. I WRITE OTHER FICS FOR THIS PAIR, I PROMISE. I AM SO INSPIRED RIGHT NOW, AND SO OVERWHELMED WITH EMOTIONS. WHAT HAS THIS SHOW DONE TO ME.
> 
> Title comes from this song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=71SvPulAyZI (Not really a songfic, but I used a little bit of the themes of this absolutely breathtaking song and put it in this fic. I hope I did it justice.)

The screams of the audience are deafening.   
  
  
They echo around the stadium and they bring with them the thunder of the applause. Because of the width and size of the rink, the sounds are amplified and they surround the two skaters on the ice almost lovingly.   
  
  
But, much louder than any of that, is the sound of Victor Nikiforov's heart beating in time with Yuuri's. Yuuri casts a glance at the man beside him and finds ocean blue eyes looking intensely at him. His smile is brighter than all of the stadium lights and Yuuri falls in love all over again.   
  
  
"Hey." Yuuri says, trying to catch his breath.   
  
  
"Hi." Victor says, then leans forward and kisses him.   
  
  
If Yuuri thought that the screams from before were loud, they were nothing compared to this moment. But strangely, all he can hear is Victor's steady pulse beneath his hand, from where it was wrapped gently around his neck. Yuuri's other hand is on Victor's back, rubbing circles into it. And both of Victor's hands are carefully cupping Yuuri's face, as if it was something precious to him.  
  
  
Yuuri doesn't know how long they stood there, but he does know that it feels like an eternity, like time standing still. He thinks that Victor makes it feel like that, makes him feel as if he's immortal. Like, between the two of them, they could recreate the meaning of "forever."   
  
  
Then Victor pulls back, and carefully kneels down on one knee. He lets go of Yuuri's face, and moves his hands down Yuuri's arms to grasp his hands. He keeps that position for a while, staring at Yuuri so lovingly that Yuuri's heart aches.   
  
  
"Hey Yuuri? Move in with me. We'll go to Russia, and I can show you St. Petersburg and the way the sun lights up the ocean and the sound of the seagulls crying and the soft pauses in between each day, and the way the streets are always filled with people. I'll show you my apartment, where we'll stay and I'll try to cook, I'll make you anything you want, but katsudon is still reserved for special occasions. I've never found the time to try my hand at cooking, but for you love, I'll brave the risk of burning the whole apartment down, and make something that you'll get addicted to. I'll show you my room and we'll do unspeakable things-" and here the crowd screams and catcalls and wolf-whistles and Yuuri blushes and Victor grins- "and I'll show you my love over and over again. So. What do you say, Yuuri?"  
  
  
Yuuri dies and comes back to life in the span of a minute. He doesn't dare remove his hands but he skates a little bit closer to Victor, and he kneels down to press his forehead against Victor's again. For a few seconds, they're breathing in the same air.   
  
  
"I think I'd like that. Very much, love." The stadium echoes with the audience's approval but Yuuri can't take his eyes away from Victor. The other man's ocean blue eyes are wide and filled with love and longing and happiness and he smiles as if all of his questions have been answered.   
  
  
Yuuri loves this man so much.  
  
  
He leans in and kisses him again, and he can feel the other's smile against his mouth, which ends up in them knocking their teeth together. When they separate, they're laughing, and they hold on to each other as if the rest of the world didn't exist.   
  
  
And maybe it didn't, because in their eyes, their respective other  _was_ the whole world: the moon and the stars and the heavens and the oceans and the lands and everything in between.  
  
  
Victor and Yuuri looked at each other and saw a reason to stay, and to call each other "home."  
  
-  
  
They barely stepped out of the ice ink before Phichit launched himself at Yuuri.   
  
  
"YUURI THAT WAS BEAUTIFUL." Phichit said, tears filling up his eyes. "I POSTED EVERYTHING ONLINE ALREADY! ONE PICTURE HAS 16K LIKES IN 5 MINUTES, THE VIDEO GOT 40K VIEWS AND 26K LIKES IN THE SAME AMOUNT OF TIME, AND I AM SO PROUD OF YOU!"  
  
  
Yuuri let out a breathless laugh and held on to Phichit tightly. "Phichit, I can't breathe."  
  
  
"NEITHER CAN I!" Phichit says, and squeezes Yuuri tighter.   
  
  
"Phichit-kun, I'd appreciate it if you let my fiancee breathe." Victor says, sounding amused.   
  
  
Phichit immediately lets go, then pats Yuuri's shoulders, while beaming at him. Then he turns to Victor and claps a brotherly hand on his shoulder. "Take care of my best friend, alright?"  
  
  
Victor nods solemnly. "I will."  
  
  
"Good! Because if you don't, I will hunt you to the ends of the earth and you will die a slow and painful death in the knowledge that you have caused Yuuri harm. Or I'll break your legs, so that you'll never be able to skate again, which is a shame, because the pair skate was beautiful and breathtaking, but you get what I'm saying." Phichit says, still smiling innocently.   
  
  
Victor gulps, and Yuuri is about to intervene, when Victor nods his head. "I will take good care of Yuuri, you have my word."  
  
  
Phichit nods once, then turns to Yuuri and flings his arms around him again. "Take care, Yuuri."  
  
  
"I will. Take care of yourself, Phichit." Yuuri says, and squeezes him tighter. "Thanks for everything."  
  
  
"Don't sound so solemn, Yuuri. We'll definitely see each other again." And Phichit winks at him before releasing his hold on him. He waves, then runs off to find Celestino.   
  
  
Yuuri smiles, then looks down when his phone vibrates. He fishes in his jacket pocket before finding it, and when he sees the message, he turns beet red in embarrassment.  
  
\-------------------------------------------------------------  
**From:** Phichit  
**To:** Yuuri  
  
**Text:** Enjoy doing "unspeakable things" with Victor in Russia, Yuuri-kun! ;)   
\---------------------------------------------------------------  
  
Victor rests his head on Yuuri's shoulder to peer at the screen, and laughs good-naturedly. "We could always do them here." He whispers seductively in Yuuri's ear, and Yuuri's eyes become wider and he pushes Victor away.   
  
  
"Victor!" He says, face flushed. "No."  
  
  
Victor pouts and he looks so ridiculous that Yuuri can't help but laugh. He reaches up and carefully brushes Victor's bangs away before rising up and kissing him on his forehead. Victor's cheeks turn red immediately and Yuuri grins at him.   
  
  
"Some other time." He promises, and Victor's eyes widen.   
  
  
"Really?! Oh Yuuri, I can't wait!" He says, and grins and leans in to kiss Yuuri properly.   
  
  
Yuuri melts into the kiss. Victor pulls away first, then slings his arm around Yuuri. "I can't wait to show you Russia, my love." He says, and looks at him with so much adoration in his eyes that Yuuri wishes he could pause this moment and hold it in his hands and keep it away so that he could watch it over and over again.  
  
  
"I'd follow you anywhere." Yuuri says, and it sounds like a promise.  
  
_  
  
They're in a hotel room, and Yuuri's phone is filled with numerous text messages.   
  
  
He responds to them all as quickly as he can before he goes to his contacts. His thumb hovers over the call button. He chews his bottom lip lightly then presses the button and brings the phone to his ear.   
  
  
"Yuuri! My son!" He hears, before he dissolves into breathless laughter and tears.  
  
  
"Ohayo, Okaasan!" Yuuri says. "What did you think?"   
  
  
"You were so strong Yuuri, and so beautiful! You skated extremely well!" She praises, and Yuuri nearly sighs in relief.   
  
  
"I was so nervous before performing, my mind was running through so many different worst-case scenarios. But Victor knew just what to do." Yuuri says, his tone turning fond when he thinks about the other man.   
  
  
"I'm very proud of the both of you, you were both so stunning!" Yuuri's mom says. "Especially at the end!"  
  
  
"Okaasan, what did you- I mean, do you think-" Yuuri says, stammering. He takes a few seconds to compose himself while his mother waits patiently for him to tell her what's on his mind.   
  
  
"What did you think about Victor's proposal? Would you mind it? Is it too much? Is it too fast, too soon? Would I be hurting the family business if I went away? Would you and dad and Mari be ok? What about Yuuko and Takeshi? What about the ice rink? I-" Yuuri says, letting out all of what he's thinking because he knows that it would harm people more if he kept them inside. Also, he's been told that he has a habit of speaking too fast when he has doubts and it's a hard habit to break.   
  
  
"Don't worry about the family business, your skating has brought people from all over the world to our onsen, and to the Ice Castle. Yuuko is thinking about being the tutor for aspiring ice skaters, and I think she plans to ask you to visit regularly to help. Seeing as you and Victor have already gotten engaged, I really doubt that it would be too fast. Your father and I are delighted by Victor's proposal, we think he's a good person. He makes you happy, makes you fight hard, makes you stronger." His mom says. "We wish for nothing but the best for the two of you."  
  
  
For a few minutes, Yuuri is speechless. Then he bursts into tears. "Arigato, Okaasan." He says, smiling.  
  
  
"Our only condition is that you visit us ever so often and that you invite us to your wedding." His mother says.  
  
  
"Of course!" Yuuri is quick to reply. His mother laughs, and the rest of the phone call is spent with Yuuri asking about everyone at home, and generally feeling lighter, as if his problems are slowly melting away.   
  
  
He doesn't remember what time it is, but he does remember that just before he ends the call, his mother says a few words that make him pause. The sound of the ended call rings out into the room, just before Victor bursts in.  
  
  
"I found food!" He says, triumphantly waving the plastic bags in the air. Then he notices Yuuri sitting on their bed, dazedly, and quickly walks over to him. "What's wrong?" He asks, carefully sitting down next to him.   
  
  
"I just talked to my mom." Yuuri answers.  
  
  
"Oh." Victor says, and looks at him in concern. "Was something wrong? When I asked her and the rest of your family for permission about this, they seemed fine. Ecstatic, even."  
  
  
"Wait, you talked to my family about this?" Yuuri says, looking up at him in surprise. "When was this?"  
  
  
"Oh, when you gave me this ring." Victor says, and waves his right hand in front of Yuuri's face for good measure. "But I've thought about it a few times before. Why?"  
  
  
Yuuri's face burns and he buries his face in Victor's coat. "That explains why she sounded like she knew something I didn't. Really? As early as that?"  
  
  
"Of course. I've been in love with you for quite some time now." Victor says, softly running his hand through Yuuri's hair. "I thought you knew that."  
  
  
"Well yes, but it still feels too good to be true." Yuuri says, and suddenly he's shaking in Victor's arms. Victor's shirt starts to dampen and Victor stills in shock. Then he pulls Yuuri off him while staring intensely at his face. Victor's eyes widen. "Yuuri! You're crying! My love, what's wrong?"  
  
  
"I- I was about to lose you." Yuuri says, his voice choked up. Tears are streaming down his face, but he makes no move to wipe them away. "I told you that I wanted to end this, but that was the last thing I wanted to do. I thought I couldn't have you with me without taking your world away from you. I thought that I could let you go, but I couldn't. I made you cry Victor! I thought about walking away, but I couldn't. I gave you pain, you were hurt because of me! I'm sorry Victor, I-"  
  
  
Victor pulls Yuuri to him and buries his face behind Yuuri's back. "Make it up to me by staying by my side. For the rest of my life. Give me a forever, Yuuri, please, my love. That's all I ask."   
  
  
Yuuri's eyes well up with tears again, but he manages a soft, "hai" and holds Victor tightly. "I will."   
  
  
Moments later, Victor asks, "What about the phone call? Was there something that worried you дорогой?"   
  
  
"Oh." Yuuri says, and he smiles. "My mom told me to tell you that she'd chase you all over the world if you broke my heart."  
  
  
Victor blinked, then opened his mouth to reply, but Yuuri continued. "And she told me that she'd be very disappointed in me if I broke your heart."  
  
  
Victor pauses, and his eyes glisten. "She really said that?"  
  
  
Yuuri nodded. "Don't worry, I have every intention of keeping my promise." He puts his left hand gently on Victor's face and clasps Victor's left hand with his right one. "I love you so much. I'm going to make you feel my love over and over again. I'm going to keep you close and never let you go. I'll cook for you and I'll train harder than ever, and I'll make you proud. I'll be there for you every step of the way. So, please remember to lean on me sometimes. You don't have to bear your burdens alone. I'd carry the sky for you, and I'd bear the weight of the whole world on my back if it means that I can save you from the pain."  
  
  
Tears spill from Victor's eyes, but he still manages a soft smile at Yuuri. "Oh, my love, you already make me so happy. Some days I wake up and I look at you and I don't know what to do with all of these emotions. I wish I could see your smile every day, I want to be the cause of your happiness, and I want to show you off to the world and have them know that you belong to me, and I to you. I'm a very selfish man, Yuuri Katsuki, I want your love all to myself."   
  
  
"You already have it." Yuuri says, and kisses the ring on Victor's finger.   
  
  
Victor pulls him into another hug, and in the silence, they hear each other's heart beating, and they find comfort in the sound.  
  
-  
  
Yuuri thinks about dreams.   
  
  
They're fragile, in a sense, because when they are destroyed, the dreamer is affected as well. But, in another sense, they're strong, because they are what motivates the dreamer to go beyond the restrictions of reality, to go beyond their physical limits, to bring the dream to life.   
  
  
Yuuri remembers dreaming about the ice, about skating on the same stage as Victor, about being stronger than his demons, about making his family proud, about winning a gold medal.   
  
  
What he has right now is a little bit different. Yuri still dreams about the ice, that's never going to change. He's had the privilege of skating on the same stage  _with_ Victor, and that may be better, in a way. He still struggles to be stronger than his demons, but he's always been a fighter. Some days are better than others, and he thanks God for the days when he wakes up and sees Victor's love and allows himself to think that he's earned it somehow. (He's never going to stop wanting to give back to Victor, though.) He thinks he made his family proud with a silver medal and his skating in general, but he's determined to make them even prouder with a gold medal.   
  
  
Yuuri also remembers a dream where Victor Nikiforov stood in front of him and asked him a question.  
  
  
_"Would you follow me?" He asked._  
  
  
_"To the ends of the earth." Yuuri answered._  
  
  
Looking back on that dream now, Yuuri finds a lot of faults with it. For one thing, Victor wouldn't have had to ask. All he had to do was look at Yuuri with those soulful eyes of his and Yuuri would do anything for him. Also, he wouldn't have asked it like that. Maybe before visiting Hasetsu he would have. But the Victor Nikiforov who had offered to train Yuuri, who had given him "Eros" as a short program, who had kissed him in front of international television, who had stood by him throughout everything, would have asked a different question.  
  
  
"Would you like to see the world with me?" Victor would ask, with his hand outstretched, and a slightly challenging glint to his eyes.   
  
  
And Yuuri would take his hand, and say, "Yes."   
  
  
He'd do a lot of things for Victor Nikiforov, and staying by his side would be the easiest thing of all. With him, Yuuri would learn how to go beyond his own limits, to learn what he was truly capable of. He'd learn how to fall in love over and over again, how to get up after a fall, how to want, how to need, how to ask for things. He wants to learn what the world looks like through Victor Nikiforov's eyes, and he wants to take that image and give it to him. He wants to skate with Victor over and over again, and he wants to live with Victor by his side.   
  
  
He remembers asking God for Victor's time, and how he had been given all of it. He feels so lucky and he feels so blessed to be with this man. He thought, before, that he was running on borrowed time, that one day, he'd wake up and Victor would be gone. The thought still comes to him sometimes, but with every day that passes, it's easier to believe that Victor would still be there, in the morning when Yuuri would wake, in the afternoon, when Yuuri would be skating, in the evening, walking along the streets, hand in hand.   
  
  
He thinks of time, and he thinks of days, and he looks at Victor in the moonlight, and he wonders how long an eternity is.   
  
  
He thinks he'd like to find out. 

**Author's Note:**

> Please rant to me in the comments, I have too much feels, help. \\(OnO)/
> 
> дорогой- my dear (I used google translate, please tell me if I made a mistake! The same russian word can mean "expensive" or "costly", I think.)


End file.
